KICKOFF

The last time Tom Brady lost a regular season game was December 10th, 2006. That means, as of the night of the game against the Bills, it’s been 2 years, 9 months, and 4 days. A lot of Tuesday Morning Quarterbacks have said that Tom Brady looked “rusty,” “jittery,” “off-balance,” and acting like he's forgotten how to be Tom Brady. From what I saw, if Tom Brady forgot ANYTHING, he forgot how to lose. Since Tom’s last loss:

1.) Michael Vick was accused of, convicted, and served his sentence for dog fighting.

2.) Brett Favre retired and unretired. Twice.

3.) Tom Brady impregnated two gorgeous women.

4.) And the iPhone debuted, was reinvented, and then re-reinvented.

Monday night wasn’t the perfection of 2007, which is our most recent memory. But that last regular season game he lost was a 21-0 blowout by the Miami Dolphins. And the quarterback that outplayed Tom? Name him. Really, go ahead.

Can’t remember?

Joey Harrington. Admit it, you barely remember Joey Harrington even PLAYED for the Dolphins. So yes, Tom isn’t perfect. Let’s get over it, people. He still won the game, and if you can’t even remember the last quarterback who beat Tom Brady, who will remember two average quarters from a game he won?

The Budweiser 4th Down Rants of the Week

Here’s everything you need to know about this week without wasting much time on any point, officially sponsored by Budweiser. ***

- Jon Gruden’s announcing job on Monday proved he deserved to get fired by the Bucs. “Todd Light” apparently played several series on Monday. THERE IS A LIST OF NAMES RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. Get the two-time Pro Bowler’s name right.

- Richard Seymour was missed in the run defense as Fred Jackson performed better than a 2nd string running back should. Pass rush got more penetration than a U-Mass sorority during Senior Week, so we could be in good shape. Of course, this could just be proof that the Bills O-Line is as bad as everyone said it would be.

- On that note of pass rush, apparently the “Tom Brady rule” is turning the NFL into a game of Two-Hand-Touch, as we saw on with that questionable call on Thomas and absurd call on Wilfork. Let’s strap some skirts on the quarterbacks while we’re at it.

- Pray to God Jerod Mayo is okay in less than 8 weeks. Short of some miracle trade, we may have to grab Derrick Brooks, who is example number two as to why Jon Gruden is an idiot, giving up on a Pro Bowl linebacker.

- Thank you for having a sack, Leodis McKelvin, taking that ball out of the end zone with basically no one to block for you. Classy fans in Buffalo are glad you have more of a sack than J.P. Losman by publishing your address. Buffalo teenagers returned the favor by spray painting a picture of said sack on his front lawn, along with the score of the game. I'm sure it was a compliment. Also, reason number three to illustrate Jon Gruden is an idiot, as he seemed to think there was no choice but for the Patriots to do an onside kick. Monday nights are going to be painful.

***Note: Not so much "officially sponsored by" Budweiser, as "creative assistance provided by."

So Long, and Thanks For All the Picks

The retirement of a player like Tedy Bruschi is the most significant emotional loss that most teams experience. On the field, we’ll move on, as Jerod Mayo is ready to bear the load of this defense. But this is entirely different from losing your best player. Tom Brady is our superstar, our headline news, our future Hall of Famer. Bruschi was the guts of this team. Not the heart, because that’s some Lifetime TV movie BS. Yeah, the guy knew how to love life and always had a smile. But he had his biggest smiles after crushing the hopes and dreams of every fan for the opposing team. That’s not heart, that’s the damned guts of a team.

New England football didn’t know the meaning of the word “good” before he set foot in Foxboro. Most fans know he’s been in 5 of the Patriots’ 6 Super Bowls. When speaking to Patriots fans with more selective memories, they’ll tell you he was in every Patriots Super Bowl that is worth your breath. But what is easy to take for granted is that of the 13 seasons Tedy graced that uniform, 11 were years with winning records. To offer up a contrast, of the 7 seasons prior to his arrival, 6 were losing years. That included a 1 win season and a 2 win season. Tedy was an integral part to the play of the defense, as well as the mentality of the team over those 13 seasons.

Tedy Bruschi is the consummate Patriot. He was the representative of that mantra “the team comes first.” Why? Because Bruschi was a PLAYER. He didn’t aim to be a superstar with the stats and the ego. His goal, every down, was to make that defense better. And he deserves “Comeback Player of the Decade” for coming back from his 2005 stroke and not only playing, but playing at the top of his game ever since, recording 10 tackles in his first game back.

The fact that Tedy spent his entire career on one team is something truly special in this day and age. It speaks to how much he cared about the team. You won’t see him retire one week, only to come back in another uniform next month with whatever team will take him. Just to give you an idea of how long those 13 years really have been, here are just SOME of the players who have left us since Tedy became a Patriot:

Drew Bledsoe, Curtis Martin, Troy Brown, Terry Glenn, Ben Coates, Willie McGinest, Ted Johnson, Ty Law, Lawyer Milloy, Sam Gash, Tebucky Jones, Damien Woody, Antowain Smith, Roman Phifer, Mike Vrabel, Deion Branch, David Givens, David Patten, Christian Fauria, Daniel Graham, Asante Samuel, Eugene Wilson, Rodney Harrison, Roosevelt Colvin, Corey Dillon, Matt Cassel, Larry Izzo, Heath Evans, Jabar Gaffney, Ellis Hobbs, Donte Stallworth, Lamont Jordan, Junior Seau, Adam Vinatieri.

These are just the notable people who have left in the 13 seasons that Bruschi stuck with the Pats. All were his teammates, and Tedy was the last one standing.

Oh, and Tedy also outlived Bill Parcells and Pete Carroll to boot. Not just their stints, but even their influence. He was the final man left on the roster that had been drafted or signed by Parcells, and the only other player left on the team that played under Pete Carroll is Kevin Faulk.

He participated in 22 playoff games, more than any Patriot. Adam Vinatieri is the only active player in the NFL who has been in more playoff games. He has played more games than any other linebacker in Patriots history. With Bruschi on the field, the Patriots are 144-67. In those 211 games, he recorded 1,134 tackles, 30 ½ sacks, 12 interceptions, 18 forced fumbles, and 6 fumble recoveries. But those are just numbers, and none of us will remember those statistics off the top of our heads by tomorrow.

The Fact is, Tedy Bruschi is one of the reasons I love football. Were it not for memories of his fire and fantastic play, I may not have become so obsessive about the Patriots as a whole. And you can’t retire memories. Perhaps no Patriot of the last two decades will be as memorable as him, besides just Tom Brady and maybe Troy Brown. Boston fans reward loyalty with loyalty (tough luck Adam Vinatieri and Johnny Damon), and Bruschi will be no exception to this rule, especially since he is one of the few faces we will associate with all three Super Bowl victories.

Thank you, Tedy. We will never forget that you truly went out on top.